Best "small truck" insults!?

[Tiger Dude]

An insult has to stick to be effective. My response would be "I chose this for what it is, not for how it makes me look." I don't really hang out with truck bros who make comments; my extended family generally thinks it's awesome because they're not idiots.

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[RRaynor2]

A buddy of mine has an F350 Power stroke. He's not really a truck bro, just wanted something to haul a 5th wheel for camping.

His 8 year old son had a confused look on his face when he saw my Mav for the first time. He asked "Why is your truck so small?"

My response, in earshot of his dad, was "it's not the size of the truck, it's what you do with it".

Of course, he does WAY more truck stuff than I do. Go figure.

 

[JennyJoannSuebeeMcNash]

I refer to mine as The El Camino.

 

[Deleted member 5352]

I got a strange insult from a coworkers boyfriend last year. She asked him if he wanted to go for a ride in it, he said no because it's "essentially a minivan with a bed." WTF? That doesn't even make sense! Of course he's one of those deep south lifted F-150 proud boys who doesn't think the Maverick is a real truck. In my book, there's truly no real definition of what a "true truck" is. As long as it has a pickup bed with respectable cargo capacity, it's a truck. It doesn't have to be body-on-frame, powered by a V6 or V8, offer a manual, have several bed and cab configurations, etc. Does it have a bed? Then it's a truck. However, I will say it doesn't drive like a truck. It very much drives like a car since the C2 platform underneath is car based, off of the Focus that we don't get as well as the Escape and Bronco Sport. But to me this is a two-for-one. You have the comfort of a car with the practicality of a pickup bed. The best of both worlds.

 

[Montana]

That is hilarious.

Probably the ones that hit home the hardest came from when I drove it to my families house. I previously have always owned bigger trucks with lifts and such. My mom saw it and goes "It's so cute. Little mini truck". Not really an insult but when you live in Montana and 90% of vehicles on the road are at least 2500's with diesel engines including your own mother, it's enough to make you go "It's not cute... it's handsome."

Wouldn't trade how far I've come with vehicles for the world though. I think many share the same sentiment. For some it might be a step up but it feels like the majority have been stepping "down" over the years and I am one of them. Just don't need a big ol truck anymore. 4K tow is plenty to haul around my toys and workload.

 

[Exranger]

Having owned 5 trucks, I don’t look at it as so small, but it is. My 98 Ranger seemed smaller inside. My 1983 Nissan was way smaller. My neighbor asked, is it a half ton? I said 1500 lb. payload so I guess it is. As far as cute, yes it is. In a Batgirl way. So cute her name is Skye and her pronouns are AWD and FX4. Also everyone says “I love that color!”

 

[Vettereddie]

Ready for an appropriate retort if that ‘left handed’ observation is uttered: [with a smile] “I’m looking at it as a perfect truck distilled to its essence, without any unnecessary fluff”.

Short, sweet, succinct.

It’ll never happen now that I’m ready…(Murphy Law #41)

Diogenes: "Behold! A truck!"

 

[K5Blazer]

If anyone overtly insults your Mav, just look them squarely in the eye, pause, and then break out laughing at them in a mocking fashion as you turn and walk away.

The smoke coming out of their ears should prove hilarious.

 

[ThisWas]

My neighbor calls my Velocity Blue hybrid "Papa Smurf Tonka Toy."

P.S. I don't see too much of him and his Suburban. They're usually hanging out by a gas pump somewhere.

 

[FischAutoTechGarten]

I told a friend that I had ordered a Maverick. I said, 'You know, that's really what a Compact SUV is.... It's a small car that is sporty and useful.' So, I guess it's a Compact Sporty Useful Vehicle.

 

[Stimpy433]

Is that what you get as a toy in a happy meal these days…..

 

[NJBob]

Reminds me of my nieces hubby. F'250 toolbox, the fake scrotum hanging from the trailer hitch. The chain going to his wallet. Works as a janitor. Has no idea how to work a power tool. When at a family gathering all he talks about is guns. His wife is the one who makes the money. A redneck wannabe. Feel bad for his kids cause he complains how broke he is.

 

[K5Blazer]

Reminds me of my nieces hubby. F'250 toolbox, the fake scrotum hanging from the trailer hitch. The chain going to his wallet. Works as a janitor. Has no idea how to work a power tool. When at a family gathering all he talks about is guns. His wife is the one who makes the money. A redneck wannabe. Feel bad for his kids cause he complains how broke he is.

That does it!
I want some mini balls for my truck

 

[tired comet]

I heard lots of those same comments. I usually walk away. However, with the annoying types I usually ask when is the last time you had a trailer hooked up and loaded or the bed loaded with a ton of stuff?
Oh, that's right never.
I've hauled +/- 2000 lbs repeatedly at ~ 3600 miles so who has the work truck ...

 

[commadorebob]

I got a strange insult from a coworkers boyfriend last year. She asked him if he wanted to go for a ride in it, he said no because it's "essentially a minivan with a bed." WTF? That doesn't even make sense!

Exactly! It's an Escape with a bed. Duh!

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