What you are describing is very similar to my experience. I took mine to the dealer 4 times and they assured me it was normal, and even drove another one to confirm it was the same. Also had several non-car people in my life drive it and to them it felt normal or it was nothing they would have...
It can be enabled in forscan. Look up threads of people adding paddle shifters. It shows as a small red number on the screen in the dash if I remember correctly.